I was like, “did you see like an old man follow me in the bathroom?” And she was like, “John. That bathroom’s been closed for FORTY YEARS.” WHOOOOAAAA! WHOOOAAAOAOAOA!”
Lindsay's 22, she lives in Portland, OR, and she hates purple gift wrap.
Hi. I like Wes Anderson, Arrested Development, Scott Pilgrim, Jason Schwartzman, Jesse Eisenberg, Ben Folds, Logan Echolls, Andrew Garfield, Misfits, Pacey Witter, Simon Amstell, The Graduate, New York City, Seth Cohen, being Jewish, wishing I could be good at artsy things, and menu items served with club sauce.
style inspiration | mubi | tv habits
“I’m standing in the basement, and I’m holding a red cup—you’ve seen movies—and I’m starting to black out…”
(via slightlynicepear)
“Alright, here’s the number where we’ll be, and here’s where we keep the dog food, and you’re a horse”
a-they’ve never spoken!
And I go over to the Wolfgang Puck Express and I go, “can I have a sandwich, please?” and they go, “NO!!!” and I go, “ookaaaayy!” and they go, “you’re a little fat girl, aren’t you?” and I go, “nooooo,” and they go, “SAY IT!!!” and I go, “I”m a little fat girl!”
When I was a little boy, I was more like a 67 year old gay man that’s kinda over it sexually, ya know? I was just like an old queen. I would come onto the recess yard and be like, “Everyone, get out of my way! I just want to sit here and feed my birds.” The gym teacher would tell me to play kickball, and I’d be like, “you want me to do whaaaat?”
